My friend Kelli Howard (KHo) met us at the train station that morning (Wednesday) and we got settled at her place. After that, we hit the town. We grabbed some lunch where a nice, small Italian man forced us into his nice, small restaurant. Then, we hit the inside of the Duomo and made our way to the Science Museum where Katie and Joe geeked out a lot, where as I only mildly geeked out. I'm sure there was gelato that day as well as plenty of exploration.
Joe in the Duomo; Florence, Italy
That night, my friends Meg and Springer were taking the train into Florence from Bologna. After miscommunication or whatever, we ended up at the train station over an hour early. Thus, we filled the time and our stomachs with home, sweet home — McDonald's.
EPISODE VII: "KETCHUP IS NOT FREE!"
We got our food and went upstairs to eat it. Oh, I forgot salt and ketchup! So I go back down and ask the man, "Can I get some salt and ketchup?"
"KETCHUP IS NOT FREE!"
... Okay?
"Ten cents!!"
I threw him a fifty cent coin and asked for five. I get back upstairs and generously share my .10 ketchup with my siblings and KHo. After our meal, three ketchups remained unopened. We still have some time to kill, so I decided to have a little fun. I brought the three remaining ketchups to the counter.
"I have three ketchups left over..."
"Yes?"
"Well, I didn't use them, so I'd like to give them back."
"...Okay...?"
"So, can I get my money back?"
"What?"
"I didn't use these, so I'd like to return them and get my money back."
"Do you have your receipt?"
"No. I was never given a receipt. I only bought five ketchups."
"Well, you can't return anything with out a receipt."
"No one ever gave me a receipt when I bought the five ketchups."
I felt I was making progress.
All during this argument, some young Italian woman McDonald's worker was saying in Italian, "Just give him the damn thirty cents!" — At least that's what I translated it to.
After a while back and forth with this Italian idiot, he called over the non-English speaking manager. I explained to him (through the employee) that I bought five ketchups — with no receipt issued — and would like to return the three unused ones for my thirty cents.
He was confused.
The employee was angry.
The woman was still telling him to give my money.
And I was thoroughly amused.
Finally, the employee drew the final line — "You cannot return your ketchups without a receipt!"
I threw the ketchups across the counter. "Fine! Take 'em!"
Best thirty cents I ever spent.
EPISODE VIII: FIRENZE (Part II)
Thursday morning, we got up semi-early and walked over to the Academia to wait in line to see Michelangelo's David. Throughout the wait, people kept trying to sell us junk like art prints or sunglasses. There was a black man in line in front of us and some guy kept trying to sell him this African print. "Dude, I'm from New York. I've never been to Africa..." Meanwhile, Katie is standing right there going, "I'm from Africa..."
American-African, Katie Meier in sunglasses from a man who was trying to pawn them off on her outside the Academia; Florence, Italy
The wait for the Academia wasn't too bad. We got in and when you turn the corner and see David at the end of the hall, it's really magnificent. He's huge and beautiful. It's amazing that he was carved from a piece of stone. Simply magnificent. You're not supposed to take photos, so we tried to sneak some, but there were so many other tourists just busting out their cameras like nothing and even using flash. So, I joined in ... no flash though. I sport shot him and got some good ones.
Michelangelo's David
After the Academia, we went back to the Duomo and climbed to the top of the cupola. There was a warning sign — "There is no lift!" It was cool. Tight staircase crawling up there but the view of Florence from the top of the Duomo was awesome.
Joey and Me at the top of the Duomo, Florence
The rest of the day involved lunch, gelato, Santa Croce plaza (didn't go into the church though), email and bought some €1.00 boxed wine and met KHo (who unfortunately had class) near the River Arno.
EPISODE IX: BOX OF WINE
We (Springer, KHo and the Meiers) hiked up a little hill that over looked the whole city of Florence. We cracked a few boxes of wine and watched the sun set of over the Tuscan hills.

After drinking wine on the hill, we moved on to drinking wine in Kelli's apartment. All wined up, we moved on again to a restaurant called Zaza's where we drank more wine. Food was good too. After dinner, we ended back up at Kelli's for — more wine!! I wasn't feeling well (Joe bought cigars) and Katie fell asleep on the couch, so Joe went out with Springer, KHo and her roommates Michelle and Mailynn to a bar.

I think this is a good time to mention our train to Rome left at 6am the next morning. Yeah. Morning unfortunately came early for everyone.
Now before I move on to Rome and the annoying train ride there, I must first write of our near brush with death.
EPISODE X: THE ASSASSIN
You know in movies when someone gets assassinated and then there's a flashback montage where they realize the assassin was everywhere that they had been and if only they had noticed the assassin following them around the city this entire time, someone would still be alive?
Well.
The post middle-aged Austrian man from the train (Episode V) was out to assassinate the Meier kids.
We first saw the Austrian man in Florence on the street in a very non-touristy part of town near Kelli's house. Strange, no?
Then, we saw him again at the Academia when were there to see David. Yes, a touristy spot, however, the lines are very long all the time and they only allow so many people into the Academia at a time.
The third time we saw him, we were at the top of the Duomo in a very tight, enclosed space.
Coincidence? I think not.
The only way we avoided our imminent death was by announcing out loud that we were going to Santa Croce church and then going back on our plans.
We only narrowly escaped Florence with our lives.
EPISODE IX: BOX OF WINE
We (Springer, KHo and the Meiers) hiked up a little hill that over looked the whole city of Florence. We cracked a few boxes of wine and watched the sun set of over the Tuscan hills.
After drinking wine on the hill, we moved on to drinking wine in Kelli's apartment. All wined up, we moved on again to a restaurant called Zaza's where we drank more wine. Food was good too. After dinner, we ended back up at Kelli's for — more wine!! I wasn't feeling well (Joe bought cigars) and Katie fell asleep on the couch, so Joe went out with Springer, KHo and her roommates Michelle and Mailynn to a bar.
Katie and Joe on the walk home from Zaza's
I think this is a good time to mention our train to Rome left at 6am the next morning. Yeah. Morning unfortunately came early for everyone.
Now before I move on to Rome and the annoying train ride there, I must first write of our near brush with death.
EPISODE X: THE ASSASSIN
You know in movies when someone gets assassinated and then there's a flashback montage where they realize the assassin was everywhere that they had been and if only they had noticed the assassin following them around the city this entire time, someone would still be alive?
Well.
The post middle-aged Austrian man from the train (Episode V) was out to assassinate the Meier kids.
We first saw the Austrian man in Florence on the street in a very non-touristy part of town near Kelli's house. Strange, no?
Then, we saw him again at the Academia when were there to see David. Yes, a touristy spot, however, the lines are very long all the time and they only allow so many people into the Academia at a time.
The third time we saw him, we were at the top of the Duomo in a very tight, enclosed space.
Coincidence? I think not.
The only way we avoided our imminent death was by announcing out loud that we were going to Santa Croce church and then going back on our plans.
We only narrowly escaped Florence with our lives.

